Dark Lord on the Rocks Audiobook By Timothy W. Long cover art

Dark Lord on the Rocks

The Tavernkeeper's Guide to Rejecting Evil, Befriending Orcs, & Brewing Exceptional Drinks (Reborn as a Dark Lord, Book 2)

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Dark Lord on the Rocks

By: Timothy W. Long
Narrated by: Johnny Pirhalla
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From lowly tavern owner to local celebrity—Varix Vel’Naris is finally living his best (after)life.

After surviving dimensional travel, a dark sorceress looking for revenge, annoying bureaucrats, and opening night at The Shadow’s Respite, Varix just wants a little peace, a pint, and a night without nightmares. But the fates, or possibly the gods, have other plans.

A rival chef wants his recipes, a baron wants his tavern, and Everspring’s grand market day has everyone cooking up trouble. Varix plans to dazzle the crowds with a daring new dish—if his competition doesn’t ruin the celebration first.

But something ancient is stirring beneath the tavern’s foundations. Strange lights, whispered songs, and long-forgotten powers are waking, drawing the attention of kings, bards, and beings that haven’t walked the world in ages.

To protect his friends, his home, and the fragile peace he’s built, Varix must face the past he thought he’d buried—and remember that even a retired Dark Lord can still rise to the occasion.

Book 2 of a cozy fantasy tale of reinvention, camaraderie, and the universal truth that a good plate of hot food can solve almost anything.

It's perfect for fans of Heretical Fishing, Legends & Lattes, and A Wizard's Guide to Defensive Baking!

©2025, 2026 Aethon Books (P)2026 Aethon Audio
Fantasy Gaslamp Humorous Magic Magic Users Funny Wizardry
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Dark Lord on the Rocks is a good part two of the new series by Timothy W. Long. The story flows well and keeps the listener engaged. Perhaps the sudden appearance of the underground city was a little jarring, but that is only a minor issue. Overall if you have encountered the first book, you will be pleased with this one.
Johnny Pirhalla returns as the narrator and does an equally great job bringing this story to life.

A Good Part 2

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Overall I am enjoying the story of Varix, though there are a few details and story beats that feel like they should take more priority in the moment. Maybe I just missed it, but in the early chapters people were suddenly talking about a city under Everspring with the only inciting incident being the scratching under the tavern getting louder. Plenty of other little leaps in logic like that throughout the book that kept taking me out of the moment to say "wait howd you get to that conclusion?"
As for the performance, initially it starts great. John Pirhalla seems to be enjoying himself in the first few chapters with a lively performance and perfect delivery. However, I'm mot sure if he got bored of the project partway through or if I'm just being paranoid, but it starts to feel more and more rushed as he goes, with the delivery of Varix's inner monologue or anything not said aloud by someone already given a voice feeling flat and awkwardly paced.
For full transparency, I am writing this while I still have another 10 hours or so to go in the book, and I am hoping these few things I take issue with are resolved by the end. Pirhalla has an incredible skill as shown in his other accolades, and author Timothy W. Long's story is as thought provoking as it is humorous.

Fun if slightly rushed story, Performance feels odd.

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