skip first 10 minutes for count down clock

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Thanks for riding with us tonight, Alpha Pack. If you’re still here, you’re one of us. Smash that like button, subscribe wherever you listen, and share this with the friend who gets kicked out of family gatherings. We’re building a brotherhood, and you’re either in—or you’re missing out. Catch us next Tuesday at 8pm

Skip first 10 minutes for countdown clock

Tonight’s show kicks off with the annual American tradition of Daylight Saving Time ruining everyone’s sleep schedule. The guys talk about how “spring forward” really just means dragging yourself through Monday like a zombie while everyone pretends the extra sunlight is worth it. That leads into some classic married-guy reality, including International Women’s Day, where Jon tries to earn husband points with flowers and a card… only to be reminded that apparently appreciation is supposed to happen every day, not just the official holiday.

From there the conversation jumps into the week’s chaos—from rising gas prices and tension with Iran to the usual news madness that somehow always hits your wallet first. The show also dives into sports and headlines, including Ryan Blaney finally grabbing a NASCAR win, the bizarre Joe Gibbs Racing spy drama, and a full rundown of the week in basketball, hockey, and football. In between sports takes, the guys hand out their legendary Red Foreman Awards, roasting some of the dumbest criminals alive—people who managed to turn simple life decisions into felony charges.

Of course it wouldn’t be the Alpha Men Podcast without the ridiculous segments. “Man Court” puts a grocery-list dispute on trial like it’s a federal case, “Who’s the Biggest Wuss” exposes the hosts’ most embarrassing middle-aged injuries, and the “Married Man Survival Guide” teaches critical tactics like hiding emergency snacks and negotiating extra bathroom time. The show wraps with Unfiltered & Underqualified, where serious space science somehow turns into a conversation about NASA probing Uranus—proving that even when the topic is astronomy, the jokes will always be about being 12 years old.

Support the show

Thanks for riding with us tonight, Alpha Pack. If you’re still here, you’re one of us. Smash that like button, subscribe wherever you listen, and share this with the friend who gets kicked out of family gatherings. We’re building a brotherhood, and you’re either in—or you’re missing out. Catch us next Tuesday at 8pm

skip first 10 min for clock

The podcast opens with the hosts introducing the show and discussing the major news story of the week: U.S. and Israeli strikes on Iran in an operation referred to as “Operation Epic Fury.” The bombing reportedly killed Iran’s leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, along with his wife and dozens of high-ranking officials. Iran retaliated with missile and drone strikes targeting Israel and U.S. forces across the Middle East, resulting in American casualties. The hosts question whether the situation technically counts as a war, explaining that only Congress can formally declare war, though modern conflicts often occur without an official declaration.

The show then shifts into a comedic “Mansplaining the News” segment where the hosts joke about political events, celebrities, and current headlines. Topics include the length of President Trump’s State of the Union speech, rumors and scandals involving public figures, and other satirical takes on news and entertainment. The humor is intentionally crude and exaggerated, setting the tone for the rest of the show’s commentary-style format.

Another major discussion focuses on Iran from a historical and political perspective in a segment called “Founding Fathers Wouldn’t Approve.” The hosts argue that the American founders would oppose Iran’s actions such as threats in the Strait of Hormuz, support for militant groups, nuclear development, and violent crackdowns on protests within the country. They frame the issue through quotes and ideas from early American leaders, suggesting that the founders valued free trade, liberty, and resistance to tyranny.

The remainder of the podcast features various entertainment segments including “Man Court,” where the hosts judge a listener’s marital dispute, comedic awards mocking strange criminal stories, sports commentary, and humorous discussions about everyday married life. These segments mix satire, relationship advice, and commentary on sports and culture, ending with an opinionated political rant about government spending and energy policies. Overall, the episode blends news commentary, humor, and personal anecdotes in a talk-show style format.

Support the show

Thanks for riding with us tonight, Alpha Pack. If you’re still here, you’re one of us. Smash that like button, subscribe wherever you listen, and share this with the friend who gets kicked out of family gatherings. We’re building a brotherhood, and you’re either in—or you’re missing out. Catch us next Tuesday at 8pm

Skip first 10 minutes of show and i forgot to upload last weeks show so you get two weeks in two days lol

Support the show

Thanks for riding with us tonight, Alpha Pack. If you’re still here, you’re one of us. Smash that like button, subscribe wherever you listen, and share this with the friend who gets kicked out of family gatherings. We’re building a brotherhood, and you’re either in—or you’re missing out. Catch us next Tuesday at 8pm

skip the first 10 minutes

Support the show

Thanks for riding with us tonight, Alpha Pack. If you’re still here, you’re one of us. Smash that like button, subscribe wherever you listen, and share this with the friend who gets kicked out of family gatherings. We’re building a brotherhood, and you’re either in—or you’re missing out. Catch us next Tuesday at 8pm

skip first 10 minutes of show due to 10 minute countdown clock

This week on Mansplaining the News, we sprinted through a buffet of headlines that felt like they were written by a drunk guy hitting “random” on reality. Trump picked Kevin Warsh for the Fed, American Airlines is flying to Venezuela again, and the IRS—after massive cuts—basically said, “Congrats America, your taxes are now being handled by Chad from orientation.” Add in “Epstein files” chaos, a Clinton reunion tour, and enough scandal energy to power a small city.

Then things got beautifully unhinged: honey got recalled because it had Cialis in it—so congrats, Winnie the Pooh, you finally had to put on pants. We’ve got dating surveys (Colorado Springs catching strays), a one-armed golfer draining a hole-in-one (somebody give the man a hand), and Dave & Buster’s putting diamond rings in the crane game… because nothing says “forever” like winning your fiancé’s engagement ring next to a sticky skee-ball machine.

And in showbiz news, it’s a fever dream with a soundtrack: Ozzy’s “lost tape” was found (the tape’s fine—Ozzy’s still Ozzy), Kim Kardashian is dating Lewis Hamilton (that joke writes itself), and Yoko Ono is already haunting the upcoming Beatles movies from a distance. Meanwhile, snack prices are dropping like a mercy from heaven, Sydney Sweeney is staying “non-political,” and Alice Cooper is out here planning a tour stunt that sounds like it comes with a co-pay. Basically: the world is on fire, but at least Doritos are cheaper.

Support the show

Thanks for riding with us tonight, Alpha Pack. If you’re still here, you’re one of us. Smash that like button, subscribe wherever you listen, and share this with the friend who gets kicked out of family gatherings. We’re building a brotherhood, and you’re either in—or you’re missing out. Catch us next Tuesday at 8pm

Skip the first 10 minutes for show clock

Welcome back, you sick twisted freaks — TJ Michaels and Jon Stacy kick the doors in from the Granite Capital of the World like two dads who just discovered they pulled a hamstring opening the door. They “announce” a brand-new sponsor (Sydney Sweeney’s lingerie line) strictly for educational purposes… then immediately admit it’s not a sponsor at all — it’s just an excuse to put Sydney on the screen and pretend it’s business. From there, they remind everyone the show is live, demand the holy trinity (Like, Bell, Subscribe), and officially light the Season 5 fuse with the energy of a man shotgunning a beer in the driveway because the kids are finally asleep.

Then it’s Mansplaining the News, where the world is falling apart, but at least it’s funny on paper: life expectancy is up (meaning five extra years of “I’m almost home”), homicides are down (until you run out of true-crime podcasts), and Gen Z is diagnosing their sex health with AI like it’s WebMD’s horny cousin: ChatSTD. Showbiz gets dragged too — Thomas the Tank Engine is apparently getting a “bold new look” (translation: vape pen), Martha Stewart’s aging secret includes prison time, and Budweiser’s Super Bowl ad sounds like America-themed propaganda written by a bald eagle with a mullet. Meanwhile, Gen Z Liam gets put on the witness stand for an “Alpha mental health” interrogation where TJ and Jon basically argue that therapy is for the weak… while also proving, in real time, exactly why therapy exists.

And when the chaos peaks, Man Court returns with Chad from Nebraska — a 38-year-old who tried to move a couch and is now legally considered “Grandpa-adjacent.” His spine sounds like Doritos in a trash compactor, sneezes trigger involuntary yoga, and the court rules he’s GUILTY of aging like every other man alive. Sentence: recliner probation, a lifetime ibuprofen subscription, and a restraining order against sectional furniture. The episode rolls into Armchair Legends sports nonsense, Red Foreman Awards handing out steel-toed justice to absolute dumbasses, Married Man Survival Guide rules (never ask “what’s wrong,” never win an argument), and an “Unfiltered and Underqualified” rant that basically says: the internet will never be satisfied, and neither will your wife when you say “I’m just gonna sit down for a second.” Season 5 is underway — so crack a cold one, stretch first, and for the love of God… don’t touch the couch.

Thanks for riding with us tonight, Alpha Pack. If you’re still here, you’re one of us. Smash that like button, subscribe wherever you listen, and share this with the friend who gets kicked out of family gatherings. We’re building a brotherhood, and you’re either in—or you’re missing out. Catch us next Tuesday at 8pm

Skip the first 10 minutes due to the 10 min count down clock (intro)

They called it the “Storm of the Century,” and TJ and Jon kick things off by breaking down the chaos of Snowpocalypse season—plus the internet doing what it does best when a meteorologist asks for “measurements.” From storm survival jokes to full-blown comment-section madness, it’s a ridiculous start to an even more ridiculous episode. Then the boys jump into Mansplaining the News, meet Gen Z Liam for some brutally honest generational advice, and dive into Founding Fathers Wouldn’t Approve with Gavin Newsom and Davos drama. Man Court is back with a remote-control marriage violation, Armchair Legends covers the latest sports chaos, Married Men Survival Guide brings the hard-earned wisdom, and the Red Foreman Awards hand out boots-to-the-ass for the dumbest people alive. Live, loud, and wildly unfiltered—welcome to Episode 2.

Thanks for riding with us tonight, Alpha Pack. If you’re still here, you’re one of us. Smash that like button, subscribe wherever you listen, and share this with the friend who gets kicked out of family gatherings. We’re building a brotherhood, and you’re either in—or you’re missing out. Catch us next Tuesday at 8pm