My best friend divorced her narcissistic ex two months ago — but she keeps talking to him, then ignoring him, then reaching out again. She says she wants to move on, but she can't seem to break the cycle.

In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains why leaving a narcissist doesn't automatically break the trauma bond — and what's really driving the painful push-pull your friend can't escape. Learn how to support someone you love through this without shaming, lecturing, or pushing them further away.

Submit Your Question

If you'd like Dr. Kerry to answer your question on air, email it to clients@kerrymcavoyphd.com or use the link in the show notes.

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

• ReclaimYou: Dr. Kerry's AI-powered coaching app
• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Dr. Kerry!

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Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist & author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships and deconstructing narcissism.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice. If you are in crisis, please call 911 or your local emergency number.

Have you ever tried to leave—and found yourself walking right back in?

This week, Dr. Robin Stern joins Dr. Kerry to reveal the two psychological forces that make gaslighting so impossible to escape. Plus—why even smart, self-aware people lose their grip on their own reality when they're being manipulated by someone they love.

Previous Interviews with Dr. Stern

What's wrong with me? The Power of Gaslighting to Confuse and Control: Interview with Dr. Robin Stern

Breaking Chains: Dr. Kerry McAvoy's Triumph Over Marital Gaslighting and Narcissism

PODCAST EXTRA EXCLUSIVE SEGMENT

Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here.

MORE ABOUT THE PODCAST EXTRA INTERVIEW

🔹 Dr. Stern shares the shift that breaks the cycle for good: "Don't allow somebody to matter more than you matter." In this members-only bonus, Dr. Stern and Dr. Kerry unpack how to stay open and connected in relationships without surrendering yourself in the process.

👉 Get immediate access to this extended interview

DR. STERN'S BOOKS

• The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life: https://amzn.to/4b50aRu

• The Gaslight Effect Recovery Guide: https://amzn.to/40qzc0B

MORE ABOUT DR. ROBIN STERN

Dr. Robin Stern, Ph.D., is a licensed psychoanalyst, Co-Founder and Senior Advisor to the Director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, and one of the world's leading authorities on gaslighting. She is the author of The Gaslight Effect and host of The Gaslight Effect Podcast.

Website: robinstern.com

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Break free from narcissistic abuse with ReclaimYou. The app that's like having Dr. Kerry as your personal coach in your pocket 24/7. Get personalized support, healing exercises, and expert guidance whenever you need it. Join the waitlist now and be first to reclaim your life at studio.com/drkerry

Resources

• ReclaimYou: Dr. Kerry's AI-powered coaching app
• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Dr. Kerry!

• Youtube
• Instagram
• TikTok
• Facebook

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist & author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships and deconstructing narcissism.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice. If you are in crisis, please call 911 or your local emergency number.

Why does someone who divorces a narcissist keep going back to them?

A listener writes in, “My best friend divorced her narcissistic ex two months ago — but she keeps talking to him, then ignoring him, then reaching out again. She says she wants to move on, but she can't seem to break the cycle.”

In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains why leaving a narcissist doesn't automatically break the trauma bond and why survivors struggle to escape.

Submit Your Question

If you'd like Dr. Kerry to answer your question on air, email it to clients@kerrymcavoyphd.com or use this link.

Follow on Apple

Follow on Spotify

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Break free from narcissistic abuse with ReclaimYou. The app that's like having Dr. Kerry as your personal coach in your pocket 24/7. Get personalized support, healing exercises, and expert guidance whenever you need it. Join the waitlist now and be first to reclaim your life at studio.com/drkerry

Resources

• ReclaimYou: Dr. Kerry's AI-powered coaching app
• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Dr. Kerry!

• Youtube
• Instagram
• TikTok
• Facebook

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist & author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships and deconstructing narcissism.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice. If you are in crisis, please call 911 or your local emergency number.