Family cutoffs, estrangement, and going “no contact” are everywhere right now—and they’re stirring up a lot of strong opinions. We’re unpacking what’s really going on beneath the surface of this cultural moment, and why this topic is so much more complex than it seems. From media conversations to what we’re seeing in therapy rooms, we’re exploring when cutting ties might actually be necessary—and when it might be a reaction to something deeper.

We also get into the emotional and generational ripple effects of these decisions, the role of boundaries versus disconnection, and how to navigate relationships that feel difficult without immediately going to extremes. If you’ve ever questioned whether to step back, speak up, or walk away entirely, this conversation will give you a lot to think about.

Episode Highlights

[01:14] – Why family estrangement has become such a hot (and controversial) topic right now

[03:28] – The cultural shift toward “protecting your peace” and what it’s costing us

[07:41] – When going no contact is actually warranted—and the key factor most people skip

[10:03] – The “dial method” for relationships: a middle ground between closeness and cutoff

[14:47] – The real emotional fallout of estrangement—for both sides of the relationship

[21:05] – Why every family needs an emotional leader (and what happens when no one steps up)

[30:01] – A healthier alternative: taking space without permanently shutting the door

[34:13] – How family cutoffs get passed down through generations

If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share "Insights from the Couch" with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more!

Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

Recognized by FeedSpot:
Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

In this episode, we sit down with the incredible Dr. Rachel Goldman to unpack how small, intentional shifts can create powerful change in your life—without the overwhelm of a full overhaul. We dive into the real mechanics behind Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and why understanding the connection between your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors can be a total game changer.

We also explore body image, perfectionism, and the sneaky ways our inner dialogue keeps us stuck. From “all-or-nothing” thinking to building confidence through simple daily tweaks, this conversation is packed with practical insights that will leave you thinking, okay… maybe I can do this differently. Press play—you’re going to want to hear this.

Episode Highlights

[0:00] - Introducing Dr. Rachel Goldman and her new book When Life Happens

[2:30] - Why small “tweaks” (not overhauls) are the key to lasting change

[6:40] - Breaking down CBT: how thoughts, emotions, and behaviors are connected

[10:30] - Where to start—changing your thoughts vs. changing your actions

[12:15] - Why body image always shows up (even when it’s not the main issue)

[14:00] - A simple confidence boost: how what you wear impacts how you feel

[16:30] - Becoming aware of your inner dialogue (and why it matters)

[20:50] - Real-life example: all-or-nothing thinking and getting “unstuck”

[25:00] - Perfectionism and why waiting until it’s “just right” keeps you stuck

[27:30] - Planning for when life happens (instead of reacting to it)

[31:20] - Why you don’t need a life overhaul—just one small step today

[34:20] - Normalizing food noise and emotional eating

Links & Resources

• Dr. Rachel Goldman Instagram: @DrRachelNYC

If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share "Insights from the Couch" with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more!

Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

Recognized by FeedSpot:
Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

Parenting teens today isn’t just challenging—it’s a completely different landscape than what we grew up in. In this episode, Colette explores what it really looks like to raise teenagers in a world shaped by social media, constant comparison, and higher stakes than ever before alongside parenting expert Keesha Scott. From body image struggles to the pressure of being “always on,” this conversation reveals why today’s teens are navigating an intensity many of us never experienced.

Colette and Keesha also dig into what it takes to parent effectively in this climate—letting go of one-size-fits-all approaches, meeting your child where they are, and knowing when to bring in outside support. It’s an honest, eye-opening conversation filled with practical insight and a powerful reminder that even the most challenging teens can grow into strong, resilient adults.

Episode Highlights

[00:03] - Introducing the episode and why parenting teens can feel harder than ever

[01:23] - Keesha’s story and how her teenage years shaped her path

[06:41] - The modern teen experience: social media, body image, nonstop pressure

[10:02] - Why teens today never fully “escape” stress like past generations

[12:15] - Substance use today vs. the past—and why parents must stay alert

[13:09] - Warning signs a teen may be struggling beyond typical behavior

[14:13] - Why outsourcing support can be a game-changer for families

[17:15] - Fear-based parenting and how it creates distance, not connection

[21:47] - The myth of the “perfect” parenting style—and why flexibility matters

[24:41] - Giving teens freedom with boundaries—and letting them earn trust

[27:35] - Strong-willed vs. compliant kids: completely different approaches

[28:18] - Growing challenges for teen boys: isolation and digital addiction

[30:25] - Collaboration over control: how to better connect with your teen

[31:36] - Speaking your teen’s language to build trust and understanding

[32:41] - Reframing “difficult” teens as confident, resilient adults

Links & Resources

· Website: https://www.keeshascott.com

· Instagram:

Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

Recognized by FeedSpot:
Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

Health anxiety is one of those things that can quietly take over your mind—and before you know it, you’re stuck in a loop of symptoms, spiraling thoughts, and constant checking. We’re unpacking what this actually looks like in real life, from those sudden “something’s wrong with me” moments to the deeper patterns that keep the cycle going.

We also get into the why behind it all—the underlying fears, life stressors, and emotional experiences that can trigger health anxiety in the first place. Along the way, we talk about what actually helps, how to break out of the loop, and how to find your way back to feeling grounded in your body and your life.

Episode Highlights

[0:00] - Welcome back + introducing health anxiety

[1:00] - Laura shares her personal experience with health anxiety

[2:30] - What health anxiety is (and what it’s not)

[3:45] - Health anxiety vs. hypochondriasis

[6:30] - How physical symptoms turn into obsessive focus

[9:30] - The reassurance trap: doctors, Google, and ChatGPT

[11:15] - The feedback loop between anxiety and body sensations

[15:45] - The deeper roots: core fears, grief, and life stressors

[18:00] - Why reassurance-seeking keeps the cycle going

[20:45] - Intuition vs. anxiety—how to tell the difference

[24:30] - Avoidance, fixation, and how anxiety pulls us out of life

[25:30] - The role of boredom and ADHD in anxiety patterns

[28:00] - Why health anxiety connects to existential fear

[29:15] - What actually helps: breaking cycles and shifting focus

[31:00] - Engagement and healthy distraction as a way out

[32:00] - Normalizing health anxiety and learning to navigate it

If you saw yourself in any part of this conversation, you’re not alone—this is such a human experience, even when it feels overwhelming. Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and be gentle with yourself as you navigate it.

And if this episode supported you in any way, don’t forget to rate, follow, share, and leave a review—it means so much to us and helps others find their way to these conversations.

Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

Recognized by FeedSpot:
Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

In this episode, we sit down with writer, producer, and longtime friend Maylen Dominguez to talk about what it really looks like to pursue creativity in midlife. From leaving a stable career to producing her independent film Ethan Bloom, Maylen shares what it means to listen to that inner creative voice—even when the path forward feels uncertain.

Together, we explore the messy middle of reinvention, the courage it takes to follow a creative calling, and how small daily commitments can lead to extraordinary outcomes. If you’ve ever wondered whether it’s too late to pursue something meaningful or creative, this conversation is the reminder you didn’t know you needed. Press play and join us as we talk about fear, commitment, creativity, and trusting the process.

Episode Highlights

[00:39] – We introduce our guest, Maylen Dominguez, and her impressive journey as a writer, producer, and educator.

[03:32] – Maylen opens up about being in the “messy middle” of a career transition and choosing to fully commit to her creative work.

[07:38] – The simple habit that changed everything: writing three screenplay pages a day and how small commitments create big results.

[10:31] – Why “done is better than perfect” and how letting the work be messy helped move the creative process forward.

[18:40] – Maylen shares how she’s embracing uncertainty, writing a novel, and learning to trust the natural seasons of life and creativity.

[28:55] – The behind-the-scenes journey of turning a screenplay into an independent film—and how the right creative partnership made it possible.

[32:32] – The power of commitment: pushing through obstacles, raising funds, and refusing to give up on bringing the film to life.

[37:14] – Why it’s never too late to create, pivot, or pursue something meaningful—and the importance of supporting independent film.

Links & Resources

• Maylen Dominguez: https://instagram.com/maylendo
• Follow Ethan Bloom: https://instagram.com/ethanbloom

Ethan Bloom will be at the Enzian Theater on March 25th (now sold out!). Maylen Domin

Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

Recognized by FeedSpot:
Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

In this episode, we sit down with trauma psychotherapist Dr. Janie Lacy to talk about a topic many women quietly struggle with—toxic relationships and love addiction. As therapists and women who’ve navigated our own relationship journeys, this conversation hits close to home as we unpack what truly defines a toxic relationship and why these dynamics can be so hard to recognize or leave.

We also explore the roots of love addiction, trauma bonds, and attachment wounds—and why even strong, successful women can get stuck in painful relationship cycles. Dr. Lacy shares insights into the healing process and how women can rebuild self-worth, break unhealthy patterns, and move toward healthier relationships.

Episode Highlights

[0:00] – We welcome Dr. Janie Lacy and introduce today’s conversation on toxic relationships, love addiction, and healing.

[2:28] – Dr. Lacy explains what defines a toxic relationship—and why unhealthy behaviors often become normalized.

[8:30] – We explore where the line is between normal relationship struggles and toxic patterns.

[11:50] – A discussion on power imbalance and how attachment styles shape relationship dynamics.

[15:04] – We discuss financial dependence, traditional roles, and whether economic imbalance creates unhealthy relationships.

[21:21] – What love addiction is, why it’s not in the DSM, and how obsessive thinking and fear of abandonment appear in relationships.

[26:59] – Why we mistake intensity for intimacy—and how it keeps people stuck in painful cycles.

[31:22] – The impact of gaslighting and how it makes people question their reality.

[36:40] – Trauma bonds and why toxic relationships can feel chemically addictive.

[37:22] – Dr. Lacy explains the difference between self-worth and self-esteem.

[39:20] – Inside the Women Redeemed program and how group work and deep healing support recovery.

Links & Resources

Dr. Janie Lacy Website

Dr. Janie Lacy Instagram

If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share "I

Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

Recognized by FeedSpot:
Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

In this episode, we dive into a conversation that feels deeply personal—especially if you’re in a season of striving, questioning, or quietly wondering, Is this it? Inspired by Colette’s recent reading of A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, we reflect on success, purpose, and why even the seasons that look “good” from the outside can feel surprisingly disorienting and exhausting.

We lean into the uncomfortable middle—the stretch where you’ve worked hard for something but still feel unsure of what’s next. We talk about the younger parts of ourselves that flare up when plans don’t unfold as expected, the urge to pull back when it all feels like too much, and the realization that joy may not come from avoiding struggle—but from staying in it long enough to be changed.

Episode Highlights:

[0:03] – We’re back on the mic and jumping straight into existential midlife questions.

[1:01] – Colette shares how reading A Million Miles in a Thousand Years sparked a deeper reflection on what makes a life “well lived.”

[5:13] – The power of story: Are we meant to attain something—or be transformed by the search?

[8:59] – Familiarity as the greatest seducer: Why we stay stuck even in “comfortable” unhappiness.

[10:56] – Laura opens up about meeting a young, entitled part of herself when life doesn’t go according to plan.

[15:02] – Coaching yourself through emotional overwhelm: movement, naming feelings, and creating space.

[18:30] – The fear of making the wrong choice—and why meaning matters more than accolades.

[24:40] – Forcing yourself into growth: committing before you feel ready (TEDx talks, book deals, Machu Picchu).

[27:13] – The marathon as metaphor: Laura’s renewed commitment to the New York City Marathon and doing hard things differently.

[31:35] – Why suffering may actually be the pathway to joy.

[33:49] – When you want to quit everything: the difference between discernment and hiding.

[35:30] – Our closing thesis: Happiness isn’t eliminating obstacles—it’s being willing to stay in the game.

If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share "Insights from the Couch" with o

Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

Recognized by FeedSpot:
Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

This week on Insights from the Couch, we sit down with the fierce and unapologetic Valerie Jones to talk about her powerful book, The Selfish Year. And yes—we mean selfish in the most revolutionary way possible. Together, we unpack what it really means to stop abandoning yourself, to take radical responsibility for your life, and to choose your freedom—even when it disappoints other people.

We dive into divorce, people-pleasing, inner child work, emotional abuse, and what Valerie calls “First Girl” and “Hurt Girl.” This conversation is about midlife awakening, reclaiming your voice, and learning how to sit in the fire of discomfort without losing yourself. If you’ve ever felt stuck, resentful, lost, or like you’re living someone else’s version of your life… this episode will hit home. Press play. This is the work.

Episode Highlights:

[00:00] – Welcome back! We introduce Valerie and why The Selfish Year moved us so deeply.

[02:45] – Redefining “selfish”: why selflessness has been conditioning women to self-abandon—and what it means to be “full of self.”

[05:22] – Laura shares her own rescuer pattern and what it took to hit the wall.

[08:42] – Valerie opens up about childhood sexual abuse, people-pleasing, and her first marriage marked by bipolar disorder and addiction.

[13:12] – Divorce as transformation—not failure—and why we should be applauding women who walk through it.

[16:11] – “First Girl” and “Hurt Girl”: how we exile our authentic self to survive—and how to bring her back.

[21:05] – Sitting still with yourself: why there is no shortcut to healing and why everything is data.

[25:56] – The “villain era”: disappointing others, standing in the fire of disapproval, and building resilience.

[33:35] – Playing the game of your life instead of sitting on the sidelines.

[38:42] – Radical responsibility: moving from victimhood to sovereignty and reclaiming your power of choice.

[44:00] – The woman dancing in the surf: the moment that symbolizes the freedom we’re all craving.

[48:17] – How to connect with Valerie and get your copy of The Selfish Year.

If today's discussion resonated

Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season. Come join us—we’d love to have you!

👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/

Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book

Recognized by FeedSpot:
Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts