- We properly wrap up our Stop Calling Me Strong Series with an always timely conversation about self-care and pleasure. In episode S3 E9, I sat down with Certified Erotic Blueprint Pleasure & Intimacy Coach, Tosh Patterson.

Tosh, who teaches women how to simplify life so they can reignite their sensual/sexual self, shares how the strong black woman syndrome led to bouts of anxiety and drove her into a deep depression. Because her family and friends had held her in such high regard, she struggled in secrecy and silence.

Tosh shares how she broke free and together we unpack:

• What causes the strong black woman (SBW) to stop hearing her own voice
• What keeps SBW from asking for support and receiving it when offered
• What it takes to become a woman who confidently asks for what she needs and wants
• What the SBW is encouraged to do even when she's falling apart
• The link between setting better boundaries and vulnerability
• How perfectionism keeps the SBW bound
• The impact of Black Excellence, i.e., striving for material success—cars, houses, clothes, degrees—on the lives of black women
• What the SBW does that undermines intimacy in her most cherished relationships
• What are self-care and pleasure and why it matters so much
• How to build the prioritizing self-care and pleasure muscle
• What it takes to heal the SBW Syndrome

To work with Tosh on retreat or through 1:1 coaching, email her.

Tosh co-authored The Path to Pleasure: A Black Woman's Guide to Healing Her Inner Goddess, Igniting Her Spirit, & Awakening Her Pleasure - Available on Amazon.

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And remember to love yourself FIRST and love yourself FIERCELY!

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