Showing results by author "Lotus Rose" in All Categories

To know Dorothy of Oz is to be afraid of her, to despise her. And yet Alice of Wonderland is very much afraid that she may love her. When they lived in Wonderland together, there were good qualities about Dorothy. They were such good friends then. But Dorothy has changed. Now she’s the sadistic, manipulative chief of the munchkin tribes, who summoned a tornado to bring Alice back to the magical realms. Dorothy has promised to send Alice back to England only if she agrees to duel the Lion, Scarecrow and Tin Knight one at a time. Dorothy keeps trying to woo Alice. Dorothy even wears an ...

MachoPoni must rescue his girlfriend, Dust, from The Land of the Undead Ponies. Unfortunately, to do so, he must become one of the undead, himself. Along the way, he encounters a pony with a mohawk, the Chill-Aid Man (who’s filled with blood), and the CuddleBears, (who have porcupine quills and like to give deadly hugs). (The illustrations are included inside the book.) This first volume of the dementedly funny 80’s nostalgia series, The Poniworld Chronicles, introduces us to MachoPoni. He’s a purple pony who tries to act tough, but has a heart of gold. And his heart has a soft spot ...

Malice has to save her friends from the fairy tale parasites infesting their souls. They have each been combined with the fairy tale that bit them. This has caused them to become hybrids—the Mad Hatter, for instance, is now half Cinderella. To drive the fairy tale portion out, Malice has to drive a stake through their hearts. So, ironically, to save them, Malice essentially has to fight and kill her friends—the Mad Hatter, Tweedle twins, Humpty and the Knight. Hopefully, afterwards, Wonderland will finally get back to how it was before the twisted fairy tales came around.

In this romantic sci-fi/fantasy tale, Darren is a human boy who’s fallen in love with a fairy girl named Cabby. So when Cabby is forced to wear braces and flees their village as a result, Darren has no choice but to follow the girl he loves, because he never wants to be without her in his life. He finds himself sucked into surreal adventures he hadn’t expected. Together, they must deal with faebots, a pig who doesn't wear pants, a magical cookie and killer dolls. But Darren endures it all for his beloved Cabby. This book is a treat for your inner child, a fantastical, unapologetically ...

Mortimer is an octopony—half octopus, half pony—who laughs at all the wrong times. But he wasn’t laughing the day a gang of waterskiing squirrels kidnapped his girlfriend. He’s a joker, not a fighter, but it turns out the Nazi ponies have discovered an alien spacecraft buried in ice. And so Morty ends up having to travel to the Arctic to foil a nefarious plot to unleash an alien supersoldier into Poniworld. Along the way, he meets a mermaid he helps release from the clutches of a bearded clam. He also meets Santa Claus and teams up with the reindeer for a mission to infiltrate the ...

Meet Brogene, a very butch equine individual who enjoys wearing a sweater tied around his neck. He once had a very traumatic episode with a fire cheese doodle, so now he just wants to live a quiet undead life. But things are about to change for him. Yes, he must go on a quest for the Dark Princess. A quest for caulk. And so he sets off for Butch Valley, a mythical valley filled with mancaves where only the extremely butch are allowed. That means, no girls! When he gets there, he has to deal with blue creatures called the Funs and the only female in their village, an odd yellow guy named Cap...

My little dominatrix . . . Dust can be such a bitch sometimes. Well, not just sometimes. All the time, but she wants to change. She has to if she ever wants to get back together with Machoponi. But other ponies and the Princess really try her patience sometimes. For one thing, the Dark Princess has decided to go preppy! Seriously, with the sweater tied around her neck and everything. She should be punished. For another thing, Brogene is annoying, as usual. So of course, the Princess sends her on a quest for caulk. But the quest turns into a sexual journey when the Sexual Awakening occurs, ...

In the final installment of the romantic sci fi/fantasy Faerie Brace-Face Trilogy, Cabby’s high school nemesis from the past has returned. Her name is Mackenzie and she’s determined to not only ruin Cabby’s life, but to steal Darren away from her as well! And so, Cabby and Darren find themselves returning to high school to replay certain key events between the two girls. And whoever ends up “winning” this time around will end up ruling over all of CabbyWorld. Of course, if Mackenzie wins, it will be renamed MackenzieWorld. But Cabby is not about to give up her power or her dear ...

The faebots are working hard to revive Cabby’s high school nemesis, Mackenzie, by downloading her data into the new faebot leader, who they’re calling the “Mackenzie Aspirant.” That’s because she wants to become Mackenzie, just so she can ruin Cabby’s life. Cabby and Darren struggle to find out where the data is being stored, so they can erase it before the faebots get to it. Because the last thing Cabby wants is all the drama that girl would bring into her life. She’d rather focus on her relationship with Darren, and, meanwhile, Darren would like to focus on Cabby, because he...

Like a naughty Easter version of The Nightmare Before Christmas mixed with Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. . . Don't let her habit of constantly wearing bunny ears fool you. Charlee hates Easter. And she has good reason to. So, on the day before her 18th birthday, she wasn't expecting to meet the Easter Bunny, a person-sized gummi egg, and a large toad. But that's what happens when she and two other teenagers are transported to Easter Land. Charlee ponders the teenage girl made out of gummi with huge boobs, and the teenage boy in a wheelchair with an overdeveloped upper body. A black-...

Now that Ember is no longer a child actor, her fame is waning and she needs a publicity stunt to revive it. So she decides to auction her virginity. But things start going downhill when the cohost of a morning show kills herself after Ember makes her announcement. Days later, Maggy, Ember’s former costar, gets caught up in a sex tape scandal. And on top of that, Ember finds herself in fear of the billionaire who bid the highest in the auction. The stress causes her to struggle with her various addictions. But her greatest addiction is to fame. Is she willing to do what it takes to keep it?

12-year-old Nina is an aspiring supermodel, actress and pop star who has everything going for her. Wealth. A magical scar down the side of her face. A fiance willing to do anything for her. All she needs now is fame. She’s willing to do anything for it. Anything. Even kill for it. After all, she already has. Ordering her new fans around is a thrill, but it’s not all fun and games. She has nightmares sometimes. Because she can’t help but feel she has awakened dark forces. By the author of Malice in Wonderland.

In this raunchy comedy 18-year-old Charlee struggles to save XXXmas from having its X’s lessened by the Grump. She faces pervy challenges in order to add an X at the end of each level. Can XXXmas be saved? Can Charlee be pervy enough? You’re about to find out. This is the second book of the Twisted Holiday Specials. The first was, SinEaster. Warning: Contains content that may be offensive to some readers. Reader discretion is advised.

The day after Valentine's Day is known throughout the world as BlackHearts Day. But it wasn't always this way. Journey back to the time before the holiday's existence... A girl named Charlee Frown must struggle to prevent a holiday known as BlackHearts Day from taking hold. But then she starts thinking, maybe it’s not so bad after all, because Valentine’s Day really sucks. She’s asked to star in a sappy Hall-mart Cards Valentine’s television special. But then she learns about the origin of Valentine’s Day, and the role of the Illuminati and Aleister Crowley in it…in cooperation ...

Malice and the team have arrived at Jabberwock Valley, where they hope to thwart the Snark’s diabolical plans. The times of prophesy are at hand, when great changes are in store for the jabberwocks. Soon, they may come under the rule of a new leader who shall lead them forward in conquest. They may even regain their ability to fly, if Malice and her team are successful. During the course of their adventures, Sleepy B seeks the truth about her mysterious past, while Jabby strives to regain his honor and his beloved vorpal blade. The two also further explore what exactly their strange ...

In the third installment of the Dorothy vs. Alice Trilogy, Alice must face off against the Tin Man, who calls himself the Tin Knight. When Alice lived in Wonderland with Dorothy, there were good qualities about Dorothy. They were such good friends then. But Dorothy has changed. Now she’s the sadistic, manipulative chief of the munchkin tribes, who summoned a tornado to bring Alice back to the magical realms. Dorothy has promised to send Alice back to England only if she agrees to duel the Lion, Scarecrow and Tin Knight one at a time. Dorothy keeps trying to woo Alice. Dorothy even wears ...

The Brothers Grimm are trying to unleash twisted fairy tale beings into Wonderland. 15-year-old Queen Malice doesn’t want to deal with them. She vows to vanquish them in a whirlwind of fury and vitriol! Ahem. Anyway, then Malice’s dear friend, the Mad Hatter, is kidnapped. So to save him, Malice is forced to work with Cinderella, and ends up getting sucked into Fairy Tale Land. But she also has to deal with troublesome romantic feelings, and a malfunctioning heart that leads to murderous rage. She'll try not to kill too many creatures and people, though. Not-quite-right versions of ...

Queen Malice and her team set off toward Jabberwock Valley, where they hope to find a new body for their friend and teammate, the woefully decapitated Jabberwock. Their journey will no doubt be fraught with peril, but Malice is more concerned with the crushing withdrawals she’s going through, due to running out of black rose. She hopes she can keep it together, despite her bouts of viciousness from a malfunctioning heart. Any further breakdowns could lead to very awkward social situations. And the team is stressed enough already, what with the agonies of a dramatic love triangle, and the ...